Superbug strikes again!

Many great things come with strings attached, so it was no surprise when the unpleasant side of daycare reared its ugly head at me. Behind the bright toys and happy, albeit snot-nosed children, there is a massive melting pot of germs, all just waiting for the right moment to infect. So last Thursday, Baby Head so kindly brought me home a stomach flu of biblical proportions. Now let me tell you--this stomach bug was EPIC. I dont recall being that sick since i was a wee lass. Early that morning i didnt feel quite "right," but i got dressed, dropped the little Dude off at the germ farm and was heading towards work. All of a sudden, i just decided it might be best for me to head for home and lay down. Lay down i did, and within a half hour i was vomiting my guts out. And vomit i did, every two hours for the next TWELVE hours. It was like clockwork. And i had to barf in a bucket because it came so fast and hard that there was no way i'd make it to the bathroom in time. I threw up so hard it came out my nose. And it kept coming. And coming. Four hours into the barf-fest and there was nothing left to throw up, but it KEPT COMING. So i decided that if i was going to throw up, i might as well try drinking something since my mouth felt like it was turning inside out from dryness. Now let me give you the following recommendations on which beverages are best to drink under said circumstances and which are best to avoid:
Soy milk: HORRIFIC
Diet coke: AWFUL, and the carbonation made the puke come out my nose even worse
Iced tea: Not great, but not bad either
Orange Gatorade: Fairly pleasant
My son's Pedialyte: Pretty nice but the stuff was horrible to gag down in the first place
Water: boring
Hot tea: This actually stayed in, but i started drinking it at the 12th hour after my body could puke no more

And the icing on the cake? As soon as i had the puking under control, the business end of my alimentary canal decided to start explosively evicting its contents. And this didnt let up until 3 days later...

When i was finally able to pull myself away from the toilet that day, i had time to reflect on what the hell just happened to me. And i was kind of in awe of how fucking incredibly sick i was. "Well played, superbug. Good show, good show." Seriously. That bug took his work very seriously, and you sort of have to admire that. And my abs got quite a work out from all that puking. And my mother always did say that diarrhea was a girl's best friend....